There is no creature in this world that can be so much deceived by the beauty of woman but you brothers….Rasulullah salallahu alahi wassalam said “I am not leaving behind any fitnah (trial, temptation) more harmful to men than women.” (Reported by al-Bukhaari, 4706). And in another narration he sallahu alahi wassalam warned, …….so beware of this world and beware of women, for the first fitnah (temptation, trial) that befell the Children of Israel was concerning women.” (Reported by Muslim, 4925).
Marrying a beautiful girl is not something wrong. It can strengthen your heart and shield you from falling into haram things…
You can find so many beautiful girls with many kind types, shapes and styles from oriental face, European, American, Asian, Arabian, etc… You will find the natural beauty to the fake beauty. Actually you even can’t compare it. You will never know if their lips real or plastic, if their nose real of just created…
There are so many number of woman compare than man. If you only concern about beauty you can so easily pick one on the street….
Do you know brother how much woman themselves being so much obsessed by the word of beauty? They can sacrifice everything to become more and more beautiful. Women have to get through painful diets. Some of them do cosmetic surgery; they apply tons of chemical make up daily. They have to spend thousands and millions dollars for maintain their beauty just to get tummy tuck to maintain flat and beautiful stomach, such as liposuction etc, they meet the surgeon to create beautiful butt, beautiful breasts…. Etc… They turn freak out about their beauty ….
Imagine brother… What if you fall to that kind of woman….
Brothers in Islam….
All of them just superficial beauty…. No matter what, no matter how much money you have ….those beauty will be slowly fade away through the time… This is the work of the nature…. Your beautiful wife can not get young and fresh forever…she is getting old day by day….. Someone who known as beautiful princess will not always become princes… soon will be another younger beautiful princess who will look more beautiful than her… there always sky above the sky…..
My dear brother who marriage only for beauty….
Do you remember the day finally you could marry your beautiful wife? … You felt so proud in front of your friends, relatives, colleagues. All wondered what thing special from you until you could marry such beautiful lady … All people started of you jealously… How luckiest man on earth you were… You felt like flying… such a good fortune you had
What you feel now brother…Can that beauty really strengthen your soul? Do you feel the comfort with her beauty that she also exposes for the other? What you see also can be seen by the other man…. Anyway… Day by day her beauty becomes something not special anymore. You see her every day, sometimes when she angry and argue with you ..you feel her beauty just vanish… even another woman look more attractive and beautiful than her…. She grows become fat.... that flat stomach just messy up after she delivered some babies… Her smooth skins just getting wrinkle…
Beauty that not framed by the inner beauty - the strength in her deen.. That beauty will be only be the disaster, become the fitnah in your life…...Your marriage will turn like the hell in earth ....full of fighting, disagreement, especially when anytime you advice her about her deen..
You already unjust to your children by give them a wrong mother…that they will grow up in the hand of woman who care more her physically beauty than care her children…I have seen some ladies they buy every new coming nice dress and full of make up and color… while she keep her children like the beggar…and it enough buy the second hand dress..
Brother finally when you grow old….when your sexually desire decrease you will know what you actually need.. Someone that can bring peace in your heart, a true life partner that bring peace in your heart, someone who will be hand in hand ....help each other to get closer to your Creator.
That day you will find out the physically beauty is not everything, there is something more crucial and fundamental for the happiness of marriage.. that is her deen and her commitment in her belief…. Her personality, her inner beauty, her brain, her heart, her sincerity, her truth, her lovely nature….. those beauty inshaAllah will be stronger and be part of her that will make you see her keep beauty through the time.. bring you the comfort and the happiness… that beauty will be the true beauty that make you soul complete…
It was narrated that Thawbaan said: Umar asked Rasulullah sallahu alahi wassalam: O Messenger of Allaah, what kind of wealth should we acquire? He said: “Let one of you acquire a thankful heart, a tongue that remembers Allaah and a believing wife who will help him with regard to the Hereafter.” Narrated and classed as hasan by al-Tirmidhi (3094). In another version it says: “who will help him with his faith.” Ibn Maajah (1856).
The life is a temporary accommodation, and the best of its accommodations is a righteous wife. [Recorded by Muslim, Ahmad and An Nasa’i] The best woman is that who pleases you when you look at her, obey you when you order her, and safeguard you during your absence in regard to herself and your wealth [Recored by At-Tabarani (in Al-Kabir) and others]
May Allah guide all of us in the straight path, Guide our heart to make the best choice and decision in life to please Him always first in all things we do inshallah
Batam 5 December 2007